The Polygamy Song

Heres the story of a farmer with seventeen wives.
I doubt their kids are gonna grow up right.
If I go to their church they might shoot me down
Because ironically I'm way too much of a crowd.

Its like they built an army of the Southern Belles.
They can't take a joke if I say the word, "Hell."
Oh, you're in trouble now, I said, "go brother go."
You like the other mothers instead of your own.

Its the polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)

Whats up with the women in pastel clothes?
I'de rather watch Ralph Wiggum pick his nose.
Its early in morning, and I see them go to sleep.
Their rooster won't stop pickin' on me!

If your wives marry lawyers you can make him into meat
All the cows on the farm have died of disease
Its too bad they dont see the light of day.
The weddings gonna be on a barrel of hay.

Its the polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)

We call it a compound but they call it a ranch.
A mockery of saints that only have one man.
Its bad luck to wear a long skirt like theirs
Because they might lure you into their puffy hair.

The man of the house must be a pimp.
His wives are so pretentious 'cause they always give in.
He sells chimps online to pay for the rings.
Nobody lives beside 'em 'cause their whole farm stinks.

Its the polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)

My name is Barbradell, and I'll get on your nerves.
Im on the news 'cause I was raided out by officers.
I have no idea what you're talking about, said
"I don't marry other men because I'm not allowed."

They better check the Bible for gluttony
Because a waste of wives is gluttonous to me.
If I marry their son I might get stabbed,
If hes polygamist too, you can have him back.

Its the polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)

Cheers to them all but dont get me wrong.
Its like a virgin version of the "Octomom."
Would someone please save 'em? But I don't know how.
Perhaps I should attract them with a sale on plows.

I aint got nuttin' on ya, but I own your land.
So I can reposess you whenever I can.
This song was made by me and it was made to piss you off.
You say that I'm offensive, only you're the one to talk.

Its the polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)
The polygamy song
(way-oo, way-oo)

Its the polyga,
Polyga-,
Polyga-lyga-lyga-my song.
(Waaa-aaay, ooooo!)